Years ago most of us had some idea of what our lives would bring even before we left school. But for young people now, life really only takes on any form after college or university education has been completed.
If they are lucky enough to ‘know’ what they want to do and manage to get the right skills and education, they may have the life they expect.
I think, like many of my post war generation, we sort of got on with what was available to us, rather than what we would have liked to have done. Personally I thought I would be a textile designer….well no…I ended up in an accounts office and just took it from there.
A recent client, a young man of 18 years came to see with his mother. They had big issues around his education and career planning. Geoff didn’t want any… and Mum wanted so much from him. This of course created a battle ground at home and eventually eroded all but shouting communication, until I was able to step in.
At the outset, most of our work together concentrated on establishing rapport with all parties and starting a dialogue between mother and son again.
Geoff did not want to stay in education but had no others ideas to put on the table. Somehow he thought that the government would continue to pay for him to live, fund his smoking and drinking and he would not be required to contribute anything. It seems his schooling and parenting had missed this bit..!
I got them both to tap …EFT (Emotional Freedom Techniques) which was kind of amazing and this proved to be the instant calmer that I love so much. We tried to find some common ground and after the second session there were major shifts as the light dawned.
It has made me think; do we prepare our young people properly for life. I see so many young people with a very odd understanding of ‘reality’, hence media comments of dysfunctional people being bred from dysfunctional environments.
In this day and age, young people would be better prepared for life by getting as much and as varied an education as possible and then just plain grafting….that means work Geoff!
In this instance Mother sees that she was too pushy and forgot to listen, Geoff also refused to listen…a very common situation in families I find! That and irritation of each other is a sure way to lose what little communication is left in the relationship.
We should take Carol Look’s (you can sign up for her newsletter) advice here and “Tap First, React Later”, this simple statement encourages us to tap before we need to, in fact for no reason and do it every day. Something even us long-standing tappers sometimes forget to do.
Lets hope that at least this young man will have his ‘new’ expectations of life met, as he has now found his passion and is prepared to put in the work to get there.
If you or your family are struggling with decisions for the future, I am here to help you, just contact me and we can talk about it.
Have a happy day