The Good health coach blog
I believe in the innate goodness and ability of all people.
My life is dedicated to inspiring you, guiding and teaching you, so that that your life can become the life you truly want and deserve.
Staying or getting well can seem daunting on our own; so, we go to the Doctors, get referred to a specialist, get some tests done, have a short stay in hospital, get discharged…and start all over again!
When we are not feeling too good it’s often seen as the only way to get sorted out. But of course, that is not the whole story. As our hospitals are overstretched, no amount of compassionate care will help if we are not prepared to do some things for ourselves.read more
It's spring and I back to writing my blog again, this one on herbs....thanks to Natalie of nell creative, my website is all crisp and shiny again! Medicinal herbs, to grow at home….. I am sure we all acknowledge that herbs are great additions to our...read more
We all want to do well in our lives, and competition is mostly healthy; though now with the use of social media we can let go of secrets and tell the whole world how well-off we are, how bright are our children, or how expensive that meal was at an exclusive restaurant …if we so wish!read more
The main western world religions, Christianity, Judaism and Islam, on the whole do not believe in the reincarnation of the soul, whilst all of the Eastern philosophies do. It seems, the older the religion the stronger the belief that the soul starts again in a new body after death of the old form.
This could be seen as wishful thinking, or a reality that we are not able to comprehend. In my case I dowsed to find my past lives and discovered four; they all seem to be a part of the ‘me’ that I am now.read more
It's been a while since I last posted a blog...life takes over sometimes and it may just be too much to think about, or was I suffering from depression or another mental health issue? There is a considerable amount of talk about depression or poor mental health right...read more
Out of that one event then, I did learn two things, both empowering in retrospect, but even more than that, I have taken the time to remember and learn from the lessons …not just the event.
At the time, I struggled to cope with the emotional pain of humiliation and lived with low self-esteem for many years; until I learned about EFT(Emotional Freedom Techniques) and then all that pain and stress just left me, and I was inspired to help others.read more
There are times when fear hold us back from living; fear of the unknown, fear of pain and mostly fear of being rejected or ridiculed. On the other hand, of course we can take a deep breath and make that little effort, enough to make a difference to someone, even if it is only for ourselves.read more
The ages and stages of life can be compared to archetypes….So it’s not age that takes a person from type to the next but the wisdom gained. I bet you know men who are warriors and heroes to the end, just as we have maidens who wish to stay in that blissful state for ever. And some who are wise beyond their years, missing some of the archetypal stages altogether…pass Go… and straight into Crone or Sage!
The reason wisdom is achieved at all, is because we can learn from our experiences; the passing of the years, the tests on our emotional strength and physical stamina. We then attain the ability to convey this knowledge, even though much of it will not even be understood or actioned.read more
Integration, which is what this boils down to, is complicated, slow and emotionally tiring, it can also be volatile. I know many people who watch TV programmes like East Ender’s and Coronation Street, and quite wrongly assume that this is how life is. This is then played out in their own homes, along with the anger, violence and graphic language and they wonder why they are having a difficult time…!!read more
Deep down you love this person, warts and all. You are in a relationship after all……..so … think…’happy to see you home….. happy you came home to me (even it was late)!’ This is being kind and polite, as you would be for anyone, and don’t forget, being polite and respectful is not the same as being a doormat.
You may have to fake it to start with, but the energy you will be using will be filled with good INTENTIONS and love. The dinner will keep, it’s not that important in the great scheme of things and is hardly more important than a good, solid, happy and loving relationship.read more
Once again, we create what we think about, so if or when you become ‘off line’ with your partner question your creation and select better choices that will make up the next chapter of your life, together or apart.
This time create what is good for both parties, see the differences, and there will be many, as reasons to love; protect and cherish the irritations and aggravations…. we all have them.read more
Stress is the one of biggest causes of illness and workplace absenteeism at this time. Living is stressful, then we add people, work and money (or lack of it) and the pressure increases.
I know that most people find stress is not easy to deal with, whilst others seem to thrive on it. Mostly it seems to depend on how we cope with the stuff that goes on around us all the time. Not everything we do is stressful but once in a state of stress, the feelings cling onto everything.read more
We all have thoughts of being a failure or being inadequate at some time in our lives. This is all part of our self-esteem and confidence, or lack of it and most of us can overcome it with a deep breath or a shrug of the shoulders. But for some, these are such...read more
There is so much talk and a load of hype around children’s education and how schools are run. There are many issues arising from government intervention, which disrupt a teacher’s programme of lessons and cause irritation, to say the least. There is a curriculum to be...read more
Even in these days of shared responsibilities in many households, where men help out with the chores, women still take the most jobs and I think I know why.
We women tend to be a little over controlling, so men doing things for us takes some adjustment. This is especially so if we have been living on our own and coping with everything just the way we like it. Maybe we should let go a little and let our men take care of us. They will grow in stature and we have no need to diminish ours.read more
At school, children are taught to pass exams, not to create thoughts then discuss and evolve those thoughts. Ideas that are ‘given’ as truth make it easy to ‘radicalise’ young ‘thought less’ people as is currently shown in the Islamic State recruitment, and have been in many religious doctrines in the past.
It seems to me that as our western culture ages, we are unable to see that the past and other cultures, eastern ones in particular, have provided a base of understanding that is sadly lacking in our present day thinkingread more
Education is not quite doing it…. Our children have never been taught to think, only to learn by rote, and spill it out for examinations. They are, in the main, not fit for a working life and so in many cases are unable to find a job. Parenting is ‘iffy’ with many under educated couples unable to teach life skills or overzealous ones, giving their child no time to just be…!
When was the last time you hear a parent teach a child about the clouds, the bird song or the wild flowers? If we don’t, then who will miss them when they have been destroyed?read more
We all have an angle, an idea of how things should be, but one person, government or organisation does not have the right to TELL you what to believe or think. Nor should we be guided to blindly follow without question.
Critical thinking seems to be out of favour right now. Most of us had to do some of this when at school, college and especially at university, just to get through exams, so why can we not reclaim this gift and think analytically again.read more
No one is forced to eat chocolate, sugar or alcohol, but it’s nice, so we do. When it gets to be the only thing that you want, then you know the habit has become an addiction.
Addictions are one of the commonest causes of illness; like diabetes, liver disease, bad teeth and much more.
Wouldn’t it be good if we could control our bad habits…well the good news is that we can.read more
It’s strange, but when I see clients with relationship issues, they almost always start by telling me how tired they are! Being tired is no big deal; everyone gets lethargic by doing too much, or by being pressured at work or caring for young children. We know that...read more
Did you know, most of the adult population of the UK have no idea how to deal with minor illness and disease without recourse to the local doctor? We have a wealth of information at our finger tips from the internet, thousands of alternative practitioners and yet, at...read more
Isn't it great when you ask for something to be done and it is done with skill and finesse? And so it should be, especially when it is a job of work and being paid for. For instance, my plumber is great and will always use him, my webmaster creates amazing websites;...read more
I think most people realise that many children are not listened to, talk to or included in adult conversations….headlines in the weekend newspapers were highlighting the fact that the majority of parents no longer sit around the dinner table discussing the day’s...read more
Like many people at this time, we despair about the state of the world, the conflicts and pain inflicted on innocent and vulnerable people. But of course descending into despair and the sagely shaking of the head does nothing to put things right.
Much has been written about the way our thoughts create our reality, our own world and what we want. If you need to have more details check out this article.
If we could see that our collective thoughts may be making all this anger, then we could see they can help reverse it as well. The vibration of peace is love, and is a positive thought; that and our intention to make this a better world can move mountains…!read more
Right now there is much unrest in the world and I am impatient to get it sorted; the fracking issue is making me angry, as I feel impotent under the power of multi nationals and their greed. Even the recent strike by social workers, teachers and other public service workers, seemed not to even make a dent in the way our lives are, or will be run even after a general election.read more
So I have no reason to say how wonderful my family was at communication but I was, and always have been, very aware how important it is. Talking and even more importantly, listening to our family as often as we can, breeds confidence in children and knowledge in the parents. There is no point in NOT learning to talk to and understand your children from birth; if you lose touch then, heaven help you when they are teenagers!read more
Note to Banks, Insurance Companies, Financial Institutions, Government, Politicians in general and big business. Please can we get back to talking face to face again, to discussing issues with respect and grace, to be patient with people’s limitations of understanding and not speaking in jargon? That way people like me will not be so irate at the amount of money you get paid and the profits that are given away in bonuses. Oh yes and please pay your taxes, we poor people do!read more
This is the life; becoming semi retired is great but it gives me more time to read and think. It’s obvious to me now, that my later years will be spent as a ‘Mr(s) Victor(ria) Meldrew’ having far too much to complain about, mostly the state of the world..! Number one...read more
Vibration is happening all the time. We all vibrate and the higher your vibration, the happier you will be, and happiness (if you read my blogs regularly) is what I am all about. Staying happy makes lives run smoothly, fends off depression, increases health and well-being and will improve all your relationships. No one wants to be with a low energy (vibration) person, we all want to be around the happy (high vibration) ones…!read more
Our perceived age is coloured by our inheritance and parentage, the area in which we were brought up, the beliefs and institutions to which we were subjected, much more than the chronological age we really are.
So, having said that, if you had been brought to up believe that is was quite normal to live to one hundred years or thereabouts, you would be feeling quite young at, say sixty. On the other hand if you were told that the death would arrive by ‘three score years and ten’ i.e. seventy, by the time you become sixty you may be feeling very old…!read more
Wars, conflict and anger cause an energy disruption that has long-term consequences in sensitive, intuitive and psychic people. Many of us are not even aware of it, but wonder why we feel upset or depressed, sometimes have unsettling dreams or feelings of irrational fear. In some cases happiness seems to have eloped with contentment and left a painful void, increasing instances of illness and mental disruption.read more
Our ‘homes’ need to be moveable; think of the emigration and immigration that is happening all around the world. Young people need to move to find work and the UK has been encouraging newcomers to our country for many generations. Where is home then?
Home is where you make it and this can be a caravan, a bedsit, a semi-detached house or a mansion. As the saying goes ‘you can’t take it with you’ and the over reliance on property has distorted the way so many of us choose, or can afford to live.read more
It’s strange that we have placed less emphasis on touch over the last few years; some of this is due to the possible allegations of sexual harassment, or even the thought that we may be intruding in another person’s pain and grief.
In my work I use words to comfort, but in some cases I am aware that this is not enough, so I may use other therapies that include physical body work. Reflexology is a wonderful way to connect to a client; we can talk during the treatment and then take some time to relax. This is similar to a head massage, another amazing treatment which connects by gentle touch and allows space in which healing can take place.read more
So if being an independent person is a requirement of a fulfilled life, at what point do we become needy and then dependant on others? Well for most people it’s the time we find a partner, maybe have a family and the independent streak changes to interdependency. There is the need to be with that person and/or children and it’s a physical as well as an emotional need.read more
I wonder what makes someone a patriot; is it peer pressure or a real love of the life you have right now. If it is the latter, your life must be wonderful and unchanging. Our sense of country is constantly changing and with it our awareness of what is happening in politics, financial and local affairs.
Most of us would say that there are times when we feel proud to be (whatever), usually when there is a critical or momentous occasion. We identify with others and as there is a feeling of safety in numbers, we can get swept along in the emotion.read more
It’s all about knowing what love is and what emotional vibration you are creating. You did know that you create a vibration didn’t you? We all vibrate, that is the energy in every cell in our body, every thought we have and every deed we do.
What we need is to aspire to vibrate at a higher rate which will attract love from the Universe….that means everyone and everything around you. We all need to find inner peace and happiness within ourselves and not look outside ourselves for love.
Having thought about it for a brief moment you will understand that the only person you will ever love is YOUread more
When you get the stressed out feelings, start by taking a deep breath. This is so simple but works and is the start of the calming routine. Then start the tapping by using two or three fingers, lightly tapping on your collarbone, just to one side of the middle. Now move to tap around the top of your head, using the tips of the fingers of one hand. Now take a deep breath again, in fact several long deep breaths just to finish the routine.read more
Having enough or even a considerable amount of money is no guarantee of happiness. There is a deep sense of relief when we have enough for our needs and when there is a severe shortage we feel emotional pain and stress. Too much money and the worry is about being...read more
Are you a ‘needy’ person? Maybe you feel you need another person with you for companionship or protection before you venture out of your home. Or do you rely on your partner or family to validate the person you truly are?
When you understand that you never will ever ‘need’ anybody, you start to live your life with inner strength and personal compassion. Though of course having a loving partner and family is important, just get this….it is not essential for your life, function and purpose.read more
This is sometimes known as an ‘overwhelm’ and can also happen when you are involved in an accident or other trauma. This lack of clear thinking can lead to mistakes and poor judgement so to avoid all of this additional stress you need to follow the following technique.
First remember to breathe….deep from the bottom of your lungs…then do it again. Oxygen will revitalise the brain, which when in trauma can be lacking, this also gives you time to pause and reflect. There is nothing so bad you cannot cope, nothing so emotionally painful that cannot be mended.read more
We are now well into 2013 and our New Year resolutions are either well on the way to fruition, or completely forgotten. In a recent Blog I talked about losing weight, addictions and finding the motivation to take this to the conclusion you want. So taking that idea a...read more
You are the only person who can make these changes; there is only you, nobody can make you do anything, you have to this on your own. Right now you are not in control of your life or your body, you may also have found that your willpower has got up and gone, so I hope this will help.
So to get back in control, 21 days is not long, it’s not even a whole month so it is doable….! But, even faster is breaking your bad habits with EFT(Emotional Freedom Techniques).
If you are still waiting for your excess fat to dissolve, or your craving for cigarettes, alcohol or chocolate to disappear, then get the hang of Tapping and the 21 days can be reduced to hours.read more
If you give yourself a couple of weeks on this eating plan you will see the pounds disappear and your energy levels rise. I lost my Christmas excess, five pounds in two weeks and it’s not easy at my age (68). Most days I ate (for instance) Spinach Omelette for breakfast, tinned sardines and salad for lunch, chicken stir fry for supper, or any combination of protein and vegetables.
The best things about this diet are you lose your craving for sugar and carbohydrates, you don’t count calories or points; you just eat natural unprocessed REAL FOOD.read more
So, you have to devote energy to your new year’s goals, but there is help available. I teach my clients EFT (Emotional Freedom Techniques) and other methods which support the challenges they face and today I will share one of the methods with you, it may just work for you.
Method to support your efforts and prevent procrastination;
Write down the ‘goal’ you have in mind
Now write it again but bigger!
Copy this out and pin it the walls, fridge, office desk…wherever you can see it
The more you concentrate on your goal the quicker the Law of Attraction will come into effect
Tell your family and friends that this is your goal – this is not a time to be shy
Own it….your goal is yours and no one else’s
It can take as long as necessary to reach this goal, it’s yours so do it your way.
I Hope this helps, if you need more please contact me here.read more
Learning how to eat, when to eat and what to eat is different for everyone. Naturally slim people know this by instinct but many of us have to re-learn these laws of conscious eating.
It’s not just your hormones that are part of the increase in your weight, though it could be the medication you are taking, or are you trying too hard by eating ‘low fat’ and slimmer’s food?…….
When we are on a ‘diet’, we use words like ‘fight the flab’ and I am ‘beating’ my addictions, but these are aggressive statements and will put you into a state of negativity, when you really want to be positive and enthusiastic about your slimness.
So part of the training is how to remain, as much as possible, in a state of positive expectancy that slimness and good health will be yours. There are no ‘special foods’ or supplements to purchase; I put you in charge of your body and the food you eat. This is most freeing and optimistic choice you can do for YOU in 2013.read more
Celebrants are the people who write and deliver funerals, weddings, baby naming and much more, with as much input from the client as possible. It’s almost like being a Master of Ceremonies, though without the red coats and loud voice!
Celebrations and rituals are so important in our lives; though many people chose not to go to the ‘official’ religions on these occasions, but they still crave the celebrations of life and death that have been part of the human culture since time began. Think of Sun Worship, Druids and Shamans , long before we had Christianity and our more ‘modern’ religions.
When people really think about our formalised religions, there is a case to answer. Why have they created wars and mass killings. Check out history and you will see what I mean; also the dictatorial voice that says, you have to believe what I say, to be part of this ‘church/religion’.read more
So it’s then I use my EFT(Emotional Freedom Techniques) skills; I have a tapping routine that prevents my mind from taking me to the fridge and supports my efforts. This will work for addictions of a more serious kind as well.
As long as you have learned how to use EFT from books, articles or even better, from a practitioner, then use can use the following tapping routing to firm your resolve.
Your resolve is to NOT have another cigarette, drink, drugs or chocolate….add your own addiction here.
First take a deep breath; count three in, hold for three and out for three. Practice this if it’s not familiar to you.
Tapping on the Karate chop point (side of hand) ; bring to mind the main object of addiction (say alcohol for instance) as you tap you need to bring your awareness to your body…think about it, the way it smells, tastes, the lovely effect it has on you until you really, really want some…
Now say, as you tap “I really want this…….but I love myself anyway”…say three timesread more
This lack of trust can create anxiety, when we are unable to go out of our home, walk down the street or drive to shops. So to combat and help to heal this, an EFT(Emotional Freedom Techniques) practitioner (like me) would look hard to find the cause before beginning a tapping routine. Though some EFT’ers would be tapping along all the time…it’s a matter of taste and opinion but I guess the end result is always good. With this case though, it may have been a tap too far!
Mandy, a recent client was in a really bad state, in fact her lack of trust was bad enough for her not really to trust me and had been ‘sent’ to me; even my fee was paid, by her friend who had worked with me some time ago.read more
The next stage is to encourage the sufferer to make short-term goals, make lists of things they would like to achieve when well again. Lise Bourbeau says in her book ‘Your body’s telling you: love yourself’ …The emotional body must be fed with goals, for there is no point being without a reason for doing or a desire for having.
At each mile stone, goal reached or task done, there will be a feeling of elation and accomplishment and here we have the start of recovery. It is also imperative to learn how to change negative thinking into a positive state of mind; little is to be gained by dwelling on the illness when the focus should be on recovery. More on this another time.read more
Awareness is the key to finding happiness and contentment. Every time we can catch ourselves getting into a negative frame of mind we can change it, it’s just remembering how.
So here is a quick reminder in bullet form to help you remember what you already know, but forgot….
Breathe deeply, and gently tap on the collar-bone EFT(Emotional Freedom Techniques) point
Check what you are thinking and observe anything that is negative (worry, anger, stress, frustration)
Look at each issue in turn and find a positive thought which will change it (love, forgiveness, gratitude)
Now concentrate on those positive thoughts and make them real…think yourself into a new state of being
Set your intention; to be calm and peacful
If you want to, ask for help. I would ask my Guardian Angel for support, or the Universe for a miracle…if you don’t ask you don’t get!
Breathe again and feel grounded and happy, smile and remind yourself how much you love yourself. (You can stop tapping now….)
Now you off on a positive line of thought.read more
You are now in your quiet and peaceful place, so remember how it feels and how quickly you can do it…each time you do this, it gets faster and then you can do it at will.
All you need to do is remember the feeling and how the peace affects your thoughts. You are in charge of your thoughts so at any time you can ‘flick the switch’ and find your peace.
When you become a peaceful person your serenity will show; your face relaxes, tension in your shoulders is reduced, stress is relieved….what’s not to love…have a go and see how this makes you feel.read more
Anger is a destructive emotion and a total waste of energy, but we will all have days when we feel deep anger. This could be at injustice, to ourselves or others, or after a confrontation that leaves us feeling bullied or victimised.
You may be one of the most angry people in the world; angry in general, angry at life itself, but you can get over this and live a happy life. A happy life is everyone’s right and achievable, it is not just a dream.read more
The motivation comes from need; how much you need or want your chosen goal. Having said that, now how do to get more motivation and keep it going..!!
If your goal is more money, translate that into the good that the money will provide, not just your new car. Money can be an enabler for the good of mankind and is not intrinsically evil. Money pays your way through life and so is an important part of ‘exchange’. You pay for what you receive.
By changing the outcome of your money goal, you will find that the universal energy is behind you and you will create the wealth and the motivation.
If success is your goal, then the motivation is driven by your need for external validation. This is ego driven in most cases, which is unsustainable, so we have to rethink why we want success. As with money, success needs to have an outcome that is not just personal, though a successful person will no doubt benefit with a higher income. The motivation needed for a successful life, as in business and career is the personal belief that you can do anything you want and that all it takes is learning the skills and dedication to put it into practice.read more
Statistics tell us that there is huge upsurge of mental illness in the Western World, thought to be caused by the general stresses of modern life and for many people, the inability to cope with the changes happening all around them.
So what gives some people the ability to rise above the stress and others to sink? It seems to me that we have to cultivate resilience, the ‘skill’ of bending and changing. Far too many people are brought up to consider that the way life is, is the way it will always be, good or bad.
Is it not time that we brought up our children to love change and adventure, to expect that their life will change and they can influence these changes? If we fail our next generations of young people, there will inevitably be increases in mental and emotional distress.
Let your children explore the world, give them challenges, teach them about money, teach them self respect and respect of others. Help them to understand that change is wonderful and to be relished with enthusiasm.read more
You may remember or heard about an accident recently, where a woman lost two children when a boat they were in capsized, her husband is also presumed dead as his body (at time of writing) has not been found. The grief this woman is going through is hard to imagine...read more
There are a hundred and one reasons why you may be in a trapped relationship and by trapped you feel there really is no way out. This will generate feelings of frustration, anger and bitterness. No way to build a happy relationship and if children are involved, this can be a very unsatisfactory way to bring them up and create well-rounded adults.
Well the good news is that there are ways to improve the situation, if not completely mend it. Though once improved a permanent ‘mend’ is always possible.
I teach my clients some easy to learn skills which help to control the emotional pain, anger and frustration. One of which is EFT(Emotional Freedom Techniques)which is a tapping and talking therapy, another is a change to the way they think.
For instance if you have built up resentment of your partner, for whatever reason, I would suggest that you take stock, remember what it was that first attracted you to him or her. This can be quite interesting as it usually triggers good memories.read more
Retaining my internal peace and integrity takes up a great deal of mental effort; working on personal and spiritual development is not just reading about it, or going to a teacher. We really do have to work at it.
Personal development is for people who want a happy and productive life, as the work involved is not like working for money, it’s working for inner contentment and peace. It’s all about managing your emotions and getting the best from relationships and life in general. It’s about understanding your physical body and knowing how to care for it; after all if you don’t, where are you going to live?
We need time in which to reflect on our life and where it is leading. We need to take guidance about our soul’s journey, this can be done in quiet reflection and meditation and of course this takes discipline and focus.
If you are finding life a little hard, maybe your relationships are off kilter, or your work is not want you hoped for, you may find a little help would be useful. My teaching is an investment in your future, so make it good one.read more
Do you know that you could be the one responsible for your tiredness, stress and illnesses? Well you are responsible for everything else, so why not? Sometimes clients expect me to make them better, sorry but I don’t do magic but I can help and teach YOU to do...read more
I have friends whose lives are lived with total spontaneity and to them this is normal. Others, like me, have lives with some structure, though a moveable and adaptable structure. To have life that is predictable and mundane, is not the same as one based on some structure and planning.
Like scaffolding on which to hang a life, there are daily certainties that punctuate all our lives, not too predictable or immoveable but the nice things in life for which we are grateful, never taking them for granted. For instance I love having a bath, people watching, walking by water, talking to friends and sharing time with my family. None of these are particularly predictable but some can be planned for and anticipated with joy.
These are some of the wonderful, if ordinary things that I hang on my life’s scaffolding, that gives me the feeling of normality; what do you hang on yours?read more
When we are confronted with others peoples pain it can effect us more that we know, or are able to admit, especially at the time. During the thinking time I had during the days in the above mentioned crisis, I called my sister Patricia to talk it all through. Patricia is another professional therapist and a calm person, so between us we created the space in which ideas and solutions came about.
There always is a solution to distress; sometimes it is not obvious and sometimes may seem unpalatable, but there are ways out of any and all difficulties.
One is changing the way you think about the issues, you could change your distress, sadness and anxiety to calm acceptance of what is going on. It is unlikely that worry would make anything better, so leave worry aside and concentrate on acceptance, then you are more likely to find a solution, short term maybe, but at least a way forward.read more
This course is self-empowering and provides the understandings, perspectives, tools and training that will enable you to find your way in this changing world, to achieve the life you dream of and increase your self-confidence.read more
Despite all you have ever heard to the contrary, you are the only one in charge of your thinking. You are influenced by your family, friends and the media, but non of this can make you think anything you do not wish to think. Think about it..!read more
In the latest scientific studies, it has been found that sugar is more addictive than alcohol, which of course can set up another craving and again, we do have a fix. Also some people crave salty food and too much of this can be just as bad for you as too much sugar or alcohol, as it can put a strain on the heart.
Just a word about diabetes here; all food turns into sugar in the body but highly refined foods turn faster and the body makes this into fat, immediately. If you have diabetes, your body is unable to handle the sugar overload and can make you seriously ill and put your organs under real stress. It is not good for you and this is an understatement. All refined foods should be avoided and this includes modern wheat based products, bread etc. Many people are in the stage of pre-diabetes type two, as I have been in the past. You would know this if you feel weak and wobbly when you have had nothing to eat within three hours of a meal. It’s at this stage that you may be tempted to grab a biscuit or six…! Which of course puts you back on the roller coaster….read more
Becoming a better person, is to be one who is accepting, understanding, loving and forgiving. Individuals who can achieve this state of mind are the Masters, the enlightened ones and beings we all need to strive to emulate. These principles are the key to personal development and ultimate happiness.
Catch yourself and use opportunities to extend and enhance the person you want to be and reject the person who would react in a negative way.
For example, lets say you have been spoken to harshly by a colleague or relative; your immediate reaction is to shout back or at least feel anger and resentment. No one would want to be this angry person and anyway you will be no better than the perpetrator, so this is an opportunity to use your thoughts to change your reaction and make a considered response.read more
The little irritations in life can be largely ignored, at least not dwelt upon; stuff happens so just got on with it. Resist the temptation to talk about your trivial issues, as they become bigger by repeating. Your focus is only on the important things in your life; they are worth talking about as long as you are not trying to give them to someone else. It’s not a good thing to offload and assume another person will cope for you. You have the issues, so you have to deal with them.
If you learn or already know about EFT(Emotional Freedom Techniques) you will know about the tapping routines that can bring your life into perspective and increase your happiness quota. This is what you are here for. Not worry and anxiety but calm acceptance and ultimately happiness.
In short, only dwell on the magnificent and ignore the trivial. This is easy when you know how, I am here to teach you, so contact me for more details.read more
If we can manage respect for our fellow travellers in this life at least we are partly on the way to compassion and eventually love. When I teach my clients that love is all you need to have a happy life, I think they think that this is very simplistic. Well yes it is; simple ideas can be profound. Why look for the complicated explanations when simple does it fine?read more
It seems that a person with low moral standing can go along with immoral decisions when their peer group thinks what they are doing is OK, and they all do the same. A personal with high morals would have had to leave the company if the majority decided on the bonus at whatever cost!
Where would you be in the scenario? Would you be able to stand up for your moral ideals and try to persuade others to think your way, or just go with the majority?read more
When someone/something makes you angry put brain in gear before mouth or fists..! Think about the reason you are angry and turn it round….for instance your boss or family member said …”blah, blah, blah” in a hasty and unkind way. Why, did he say that? That person is not you and his words or actions are his, not yours.
Accept that he is in a difficult place and take a deep breath; if you have transgressed then apologise , but leave space between the outburst and your reaction. So instead of anger your response is considered, that is wisdom and needs to be learned and practiced .
Say a car runs into your back bumper…that is his/her fault, by law. But in that instant you have no idea of any extenuating circumstances so you cannot make any judgement. An angry or hasty reaction will not serve your purpose or help anyone. In this case the wise way is to accept what had happened with decorum, help the driver, who may be someone like your very best friend and even traumatised; then sort out the legalities with gentle humility.read more
There is a lot to be said about positive thinking and just by acknowledging that your illness can be healed seems to work wonders; this is now being scientifically investigated! Well it’s a good start, rather like other things that we know but have only recently been accepted by the medical professions and scientific community.
I could mention for instance, particles that are only active when looked at and change with the scientists thoughts. So its our perceptions of how life is, that maybe we should look at. EFT helps focus on what it you truly want, so if you want wellness that tapping will reinforce that.
Shakespeare was right…..”There are more things in heaven and earth, Horatio, Than are dreamt of in your philosophy.”read more
As an experienced mediator, helping people through family, personal and business conflicts, I find the most damage is created by the “he said/she said” bits of conversations. The words said are not considered, some times meant to hurt or spread ‘not quite accurate’ information and can be the beginning of conflict or the fire that keeps it going.
The trouble is that words injure, and sometimes terminally. When I was a child there was a well know saying that my Mother would say to me when I was bullied at school.
‘Sticks and stones my break my bones but words can never hurt me’. How wrong this is; words nice or offensive, can stay in the memory and hurtful ones can cause untold misery.
By using EFT(Emotional Freedom Techniques) we can locate the pain caused by conflict and turn round and release the negative feelings, so freeing ourselves from years of pain. Internalised emotional pain creates illness, so to be healthy we need to unburden ourselves of this anguish.
Live a lighter life, no burdens , no conflicts, only a high vibration and heaps of happiness.read more
It’s a bit like the parable of the Good Samaritan, do we make the effort to help, or do we just heave a sigh and be glad it’s not us, passing by on the other side of the road?
Would you ask a stranger in from the street, to share whatever you have, food and warmth even if the only bed is the floor? Or would you think they may steal from you or hurt you physically?
It is a real dilemma, I have never been confronted with this possibility so have no idea how I would react. I know how I would LIKE to react; with a genuine welcome, being happy to share what I have.
Have a think about this next time you see a homeless person, maybe begging for the price of a cup of tea. Do you protect what you have worked so hard to obtain or to give what you can, even if it’s tough!
This I hardly asking the person to share your home on cold night but I am sure that every giving gesture, however small, increases your happiness and therefore your vibration, not to mention the happiness of the recipient.read more
Jenny called me a week or so into January, asking to come and see me over a relationship issue that had all the marks of the scenario set out above. Her new man was charming, considerate, good-looking and not a church mouse on the money front….what was not to like? But as it transpired he was becoming a bit obsessive and Jenny found this a bit scary.
Jenny admitted that she had rather let her guard down at the same time as her hair, and had told him things about herself that would have been better said at a much later stage in the relationship. The man, we shall call Gordon for this purpose, had latched onto something about Jenny and though there was a mutual attraction is seemed that Gordon had focused on her sexually rather than anything else. Jenny is not repressed in that area, maybe the bit she could have held back, but would have much preferred to have friendship at the top of her list.
Gordon was constantly calling her mobile and engineering time alone for sex and then leaving her and getting on with his life. Jenny was feeling used, well she would in those circumstances, even though she enjoyed her time with Gordon. This was a pattern that Jenny had repeated many times before, but she really wanted this one to be different.
So what to do to re-address this issue? Well there was no way to change what happened, but by using some of my methods and techniques we refined in our sessions, things can be changed for the better.read more
I have a neighbour who enjoys her ill-health, I am sure you will know people like her. A shelf full of pills and potions from the doctor, of which she is really proud! She has always had an uneasy and difficult relationship with her mother, over which she harbours anger, guilt and resentment. It is hardly surprising that will all these negative emotions being held onto so tightly, that her physical body has noticed and is letting her know…!
If you have issues of emotional or physical pain and need to make changes in the direction your life is going, then contact me and we can talk about how together we can change your world.read more
Those are some of the minor tools of living but there are, of course, some much more fundamental tools that we should acknowledge and use regularly. For instance, do you ever consciously send out love to another human being in distress, do you listen to people with care and compassion? Where are your tools for coping with emotions, yours and others? These tools cost nothing, other than remembering to use them.
I have been thinking about the recent cruise ship accident; would I have been a screamer, would I have panicked? Would I have (instinctively or unconsciously, self-preservation is a powerful force) trampled over other people to get to safety?
Which of my tools would I have remembered to use? Well I hope I would have been able to keep myself calm with tapping (EFT-Emotional Freedom Techniques) my inner discipline (still working on this one) and some deep breathing. But would I have had the courage to help others? I don’t know, though I really hope that all the years of study and my ‘normal’ compassionate and positive outlook on life would have kicked in and enabled me to ‘be the calm place’ for others, even in such a crisis.
Which tools could you call on in an emergency, tools that don’t require ‘things’, only thoughts that are deeply implanted for your survival and the benefit of the community in which you find yourself?
If you’re not sure then contact me and lets see what my tools can teach you.read more
I have had a interest in my weight, mostly keeping it level, since my mid twenties and after having three children. Then over the last five years, well since I was about 60 really, my girth has steadily increased. I started to use a size larger in clothes and choose styles that would camouflage my tummy. What I should have done, of course, was to take action then and not leave it until my previously excellent health was in danger.
On reflection, both my parents were overweight when elderly, my sister struggles with similar issues and we are both very aware that to be healthy into old age we require less fat on the body then they had.
So what went wrong then? Procrastination, lack of awareness, being too comfortable, loving my food and not loving exercise…….I could go on!read more
It occurs to me that we all have hidden stuff; backgrounds, people, lies and deceits, that we are too shy or embarrassed to admit or have pushed away in the dark recesses, not ever to be touched or examined.
If you have done any EFT(Emotional Freedom Techniques) you will have come across the ‘Personal Peace Procedure’, this is a method of finding and then releasing past issues, tensions and events and being able to ‘let them go’…..and it works very well for most people. Once examined, the old burdens of guilt and anxiety can be laid to rest, so life moves on with less weight on your shoulders.
As part of my 2012 set of goals and intentions, I have set out to re-examine some of my old beliefs in the hopes that this release of energy will trigger more people to see for themselves how wonderful life really is and to find their own new direction. Also how transient, how fast it passes and how to cope with the constant change that is life for everyone.
One common held belief is that you cannot change other people; this is part of the teaching that I have purported for many years. I now realise that this is not so; you can change other people but only by example, not by coercion.
Clients tell me that my teaching and counselling has ‘changed them’ ; I read book written by people more knowledgeable than me and, yes it changes me. Part of these changes become the self realisation and self-knowledge that has escaped us before, or maybe, more to the point, we were not ready to hear it before.
Growing in wisdom seems to me rather a long journey, but I do believe I am getting there; part of this is the self knowledge that I am learning by listening to my inner self, understanding by thinking and gaining awareness and confidence by teaching what I know.
If you have areas where your direction is less than clear, where your self-knowledge is falling short, then when you are ready to hear what and who you truly are, come and talk to me.
Diane Hollidayread more
It’s not a bad thing to have opinions but if you find yourself constantly looking for arguments and for people to challenge then maybe it’s time to learn tolerance.
For instance it is not any of your business how immigrants get here or how long they stay, but you could show a welcome like you would for anybody, they are human beings. Grass will grow and need cutting according to the weather and how you like your grass to look…..it’s not your business how anyone else deals with their grass. When your opinion ceases to be just that and becomes a row, take a deep breath and think about the other persons point of view, even the Bankers greed has another side….think about it.
Next time you are confronted by the possibility of an argument, turn it round. Say that you find this point of view interesting and then…..say no more.read more
Around the new and full moon phases, many people feel at odds with life and become unsettled ; normal life seems to change or is disturbed. Even if you have never read about the changes that are happening in the world right now, get yourself aware of the moon. Stand and look (assuming there are no clouds) just know that you are part of the energy that holds us all on this planet.
If you can dowse, ask some questions about your future for instance ”Is my current work right for me?” If you think you can’t dowse this is good time to try again or learn how to; it’s another link to your intuition and inner consciousness. Many of the EFT(Emotional Freedom Techniques) Masters use dowsing as another tool, so get dowsing this or any full moon. You could try a round of tapping first, just to get yourself grounded…then off you go. When you ‘get it’, it can be amazing!
Contact me if you need help…!read more
The most common emotional causes related to cancer are unresolved anger, resentment and the refusal to forgive. Holding a grudge has a tremendous negative emotional charge, and, ironically, does far more damage to the person holding the grudge than to the target of the resentment. The feeling of anger produces a clenching sensation in the body and a contractive energy at a cellular level. Cells can only be in either contraction or growth, and emotional negativity shuts down the cell’s ability to grow and thrive. This constricted posture causes the body to be much more vulnerable to disharmony and disease.
Emotional Freedom Techniques can help address the roots of cancer at a deep and cellular level and within the body’s meridian system. Mesothelioma is a cancer caused by exposure to asbestos fibers—this is a good example to use because it can be considered an unpreventable form of cancer. Mesothelioma life expectancy is eighteen months or less, but with the help of Emotional Freedom Techniques, in this time a person can make tremendous progress in releasing anger and resentment. The result can be a longer life expectancy and better quality of life in their remaining time.read more
When I have clients who are overweight and unhappy about it, I explain that no one but them is putting the food in their mouths. They are not forced to eat the quantities or types of food that are making them fat. Nor are the forced to think that they cannot change.
Emotional Freedom Techniques (EFT) can help a great deal with these issues. Once learned you will have the skill to use it when ever you need to change your mindset, make changes for the better, or just to remember who you really are.read more
What a holiday and to come home slimmer seems like a miracle! I have been to Thailand with my sister, really to visit my son who lives there but obviously we took a two-week holiday at the same time. Never having been to South East Asia before, the whole experience...read more
We as individuals are unable to change anything on the above list of woes , so we need to take the opposite action and provide a calm and loving environment for the really scared and those who have been injured, psychically, emotionally or financially.
If this is becoming a ‘trauma’ to you then try the following tapping routine. EFT(Emotional Freedom Techniques) does just that, it frees you from emotional stress. More details can be found here.
Even though this is rather scary I love myself and know that I am OK
I send out love and forgiveness for the perpetrators of violence and theft
I send out peace to those worried about money
I know that whatever happens I am safe and cared for
I let these feelings of despair and loss leave me
I choose to be resilient
I choose to be flexible
I choose love and forgivness and I have the spirit in me to do this
There is so much good in our wonderful world, just look around and focus on that instead.
If you need any support right now just contact me.
Keep calm and carry on and Smile…happiness is catching. Diane Hollidayread more
So what happens to people who are in pain with, say back problems, all the time and pain relief tablets not longer have any effect. Or the pain relief products produce side effects that are almost as bad as the pain?
Well you could try EFT(Emotional Freedom Techniques), this is gentle tapping on meridian points, the same as used in Acupuncture and Shiatsu. But first you may like to think about why you have this pain.
If you have been involved in an accident and your pain is a result of this you can still tap successfully but in the majority of cases there may be underlying reasons that are creating the pain.
One way to find the cause of your pain is called Metaphysics and there are two books to which I refer for my clients. Louise Hay – You Can Heal Your Life and Lisa Bourbeau – Your Body is Telling You to Love Yourself
For instance, say you have pain in your knee(s) this could be connected to your inability to move on and be more flexible in your life. So let’s do a tapping routine that will demonstrate how to do it. Before we start, you may be aware that your body renews every cell in seven-year cycles…so every seven years you are a new you!
My right knee has been giving me problems, on and off for several years and I had put this down to an injury playing netball when I was 14. Since then my body has had over seven sets of seven years to repair this damage, so what is that I can’t let go?
Karate Chop; Even though I have this pain in my knee, I love and accept myself completely (or I am know I am OK)
Say this, or your version three times. Then going round the points (they can be found and downloaded here) ….I have pain in my knee…I accept this pain…What is this pain telling me….Today I choose….(you are the only person able to choose your life).. to free myself of this pain…I let go of this pain….I choose to be more flexible….I know I can move forward with ease….
Do this several times and end with a light tapping around the crown of your head and affirm…I have no pain…!read more
It seems to have several causes, though the most usual is being overweight and not taking enough exercise and sometimes there is a genetic link. Which had put me and several of my friends and family in line to contract it. I have a sweet tooth and have tended to overeat on occasions, I also have less exercise than I would like and to cap it all my father had Type 2 Diabetes in his later years, so I get the genetic link as well!
Fifty years ago the food we ate was less refined and we did more physical work; sweet food was a treat and not for everyday, cola and fizzy drinks were not widely drunk and we took in more fibre. We also had less addictions to foods and drinks.
I have understood this for several years and have made a conscious effort to change the way I live; I did get a scare a few months ago when I started to get high blood pressure and the occasional hypoglycaemic episode (feeling faint and dizzy when I had not eaten for a while). At the time I was under stress, another major cause of illness, in fact the main one.
Well like all good seekers of the truth, I have investigated and find that Type 2 Diabetes is totally controllable and not at all inevitable if I take care of ME.
In my therapy practice I encourage my clients to love themselves and care for their mind, body and soul; this is not a selfish act, this is self-love and self-preservation and is to enable you to love others.
So the teacher is doing what I teach. My blood pressure and stress I control with EFT(Emotional Freedom Techniques), my blood sugar I control with my diet and exercise and in doing this I can evade the genetic link.
If you have issues around your health or addictions please take care of yourself without becoming a burden on others, but get well, so you can show others that illness is not to be anticipated as inevitable but something that we can cope with using our own power and skills.read more
When a person loses their job, they may also feel a loss of identity and even though there is more to a person than the work they do, it can be a common worry. Loss of personal status can translate into changes in the persons relationships, in particular with those most dear, like their partner . The ‘other’ one, the one with the job, becomes the main earner, the one without a job is the person who stays at home, checks the newspapers, goes to the job centre and consequently routines change and the ever tricky balance of power shifts.read more
As I could see the rather ‘vacant’ looks on some faces, I went back to basics and talked about energy and how it affects us. How having positive energy raises our vibration and creates happiness and how negative energy reduces our vibration and creates emotional pain.
This was new to all but two people in the room, so I mentioned Personal Development and I asked “Does everyone here think about themselves, love themselves and do you give yourself respect?” So many blank looks told me the answer was ‘no’.
I guess most of these elderly, mostly women, have been so caught up in their role as carer, one for 53 years, that the outside world and the sort of books that I read and information I get, are just not on their radar.
I am eternally grateful that I had started my personal development and spiritual journey long before my husband became ill and dependant on me. The way we think has the most amazing impact on the ways our lives turn out, so thinking that all is well and that we can cope, means that we have the strength to do what is required at that time in our lives when we are called upon to make sacrifices. Ask yourself “What is this teaching me about myself” …..I know I got patience, acceptance, love and forgiveness, which is still helping me through my life.
I left the meeting with a good response but no customary round of applause that is usual at the end of an hour-long talk! So when I got a telephone call from one of the ‘old ladies’ saying how my talk had made them (several anyway) start to think in a different way, I was relieved and pleased that I had a made a difference, however small.
This is not way we want to see our lives in old age, being a carer and having little life of our own but it affects so many people, I think we should be open about supporting carers and treating them as the very special people they truly are.
I may even get asked back to do further work and EFT with them, I hope so, it’s never to late to learn new tricks!read more
Sometimes, a small disagreement can turn into an argument and there are times when none of the parties will remember how it happened. It’s not easy to get back to the original issue as other things may have been brought into play, as in ”Last week you said……” and “She told me…..” for instance.
If you are having family or relationship issues that are disturbing enough to create a conflict, you will first need to establish some common ground or the inability to see the real issue may be lost forever. We build our own ‘story’ of events and add our hurt feelings. Each persons ‘story’ of the disagreement will be different.
In most cases I find the following mediation system works well ;
Go back to when and what started the conflict and ask everyone write down their own version in brief.
Each member of the conflict needs to use EFT(Emotional Freedom Techniques) and tap on the anger, hurt, guilt……or whatever comes up before you take the next step. Here is an example…. Set up….Even though I have this anger (etc) , I love and accept myself completely. Then on the reframe the words to use are …I choose to release my anger (etc)…….I send forgiveness, acceptance and love to myself and all the others.
Around the table, take turns to talk about the issue using the FACTS not emotions
Everyone must HEAR the others in the dispute, so give time to listen to each persons ‘story’
When all the versions have been heard, take some time for this to digest.
Have another listening session and see where the understanding of people failings and shortcomings can be used to further the discussion.
Look for the underlying reasons for perceived ‘bad behaviour’ …tap together for your INTENTION TO RESOLVE THIS ISSUE
Consider the next steps; maybe another round table meeting. Resist the temptation to talk about people behind their backs in a negative way….look for the positive in each other and provide love and support for the most vulnerable.
Accept that not everyone will agree, but there is a way forward with forgiveness, even of the worst of so-called ‘crimes’…!
We are all human beings and compassion is the finest expression of our humanity.
If you need more personal support with this please contact me for a chat and see what we can do together to resolve your pain.read more
This man in his 40’s was desperately unhappy at work and though his home life was good he found that was home much less, as he strived to get on in his career. This unhappiness brought about several deliberations and ideas; from moving away, getting a less stressful job, emigrating or even starting his own business. He admitted that he would much rather be doing something completely different from his current job, but the family and mortgage had to come first.
These possibilities threw up more problems as the children were happy and settled at school, his wife had a part-time job and loved living where they were. All of his pondering was promoting more stress and anxiety and he was very aware that this could lead to illness, so he came to me to learn EFT(Emotional Freedom Techniques) and to get some impartial guidance.
Without the family behind him, a big lifestyle change would have to be left for later in his life, if it was still appropriate. So started our consultation and tapping by concentrating very much on now and how he felt about himself and his work.
It transpired that he felt he was an underachiever, so had to work harder than his colleagues to retain his self-worth. He was constantly asked to put in extra hours, work from home at the weekends, all this for no more money I would add, and this was becoming unacceptable to his wife and family.
We worked together on his feelings of self; his inability to say no to extra hours and to make the job his and not just the company’s. During our tapping and reframing we considered the emotional pain of possibly losing his job if ‘he’ changed and became more assertive, against being ill or losing his family. We tapped for acceptance, forgiveness and love of self; that meant valuing who he was and what he had achieved.
After several session he found his inner power; he become considerably more self-reliant and now looks forward to work, understanding and managing the pressures and has learned that delegation is not failure!
So his dilemma had been much more about escaping from himself than from the life he was living.
We learn as we go through life and should remember that reflection on who we truly are is an ongoing process. If you are discovering that ‘finding you’ is not as easy as you thought, contact me and together we can work on that!read more
It’s not easy to cope or provide effective care if you are not getting your own rest or are able to follow your own sleep pattern.
I found this article which acknowledges this change in circadian rhythms as a normal occurrence in dementia sufferers and about the scientists who hope to find a better way to deal with it.
My method for dealing with lack of sleep and the stress that goes with it is EFT(Emotional Freedom Techniques). The tapping clears anxiety and allows the body to relax, so sleep is easy even if disturbed.
If you are a carer dealing with dementia you need all the help that you get, so please look on my website for details of EFT or contact me for a chat and see what we can do together.read more
Do you have itchy eyes, a runny nose and tightness in your chest, are you sneezing and getting hot for no reason? Then you may just have a dose of hay fever. This is something my poor sister gets most years and I never get…until now! So yesterday in the exceptional...read more
So, never one to let too much grass grow under my feet, I am hoping to start soon in a part-time job, back in the world of finance and business and I already do a few hours a week caring for a gentleman with Alzheimer’s, also providing support and companionship for his wife.
This is giving more than an income, it helps me to feel part of society again and gets me talking to people. Not that I don’t talk to my clients, but it’s a different relationship and has to remain as client and therapist.
This extra work also benefits me by providing a top up on all my previous experiences, in business and as a carer, so that my skills are being updated and consolidated. I like to learn something new every day, and this sure helps.
The biggest thrill is that the ‘being alone’ feeling, when working at home and since my husband died, has gone. I really knew all along that I was OK, but just occasionally I would be overwhelmed by ‘being aloneness’ and now I just don’t have time…!!
Of course I tap …EFT(Emotional Freedom Techniques), when I feel a bit down and having fewer clients than normal I don’t get the benefits of working with them each day. Yes, I mean benefits….teaching a client how to manage their lives, in whatever area, involves tapping and so the benefits apply to me just as much as the client. Tappers call this ‘Borrowing Benefits’ and it’s all about sharing the energy.
Then, guess what, just as I get myself busy outside my practice…my practice gets busy again. Law of Attraction working here I think. My vibration is high, doing what I love and so I am attracting more of what I love doing!
Sign up for my April newsletter, out next week for more on how to create your own happiness.
Have a very happy day and it this is not easy for you, contact me and get some personal support.read more
……that we eat more when we are on our own and/or frankly bored! Well not much of a revelation really, as I guess many of us can relate to that.
When we are in a family or partnership environment we adhere to general rules and know that deviation will be noted. I remember very well my late husband, before he became ill, saying that two biscuits were sufficient for him with his morning coffee, so of course they were for me too! Now there is no one to notice if I have five……oops!
Of course I tap for my mini addictions EFT(Emotional Freedom Techniques) is great for getting off chocolate or alcohol etc. and I tap when my resolve weakens and I just have to have more..of whatever I am eating. I just have to remember to tap…as mentioned in a previous post, we forget the basics sometimes, even Practitioners.
Discipline is easier when we are watched and so easy to ditch when we are not. So maybe the trick is to assume someone is watching over you and just keeping an eye on what you are eating, just so things don’t get out of control…..Well I am summoning a Food Angel, just to see if this theory works, so will keep you posted.
You may be interested in some articles from the Science Daily web site, both the links are in connection with this Blog in some shape or form. I get the weekly compilation , so many of the articles are way above my head….but some just grab me….like these did. The second one is a little worrying….read it if you find yourself gravitating towards anger…!
Chicken Soup for the Soul: Comfort Food Fights Loneliness
Cranky? On a Diet? How Self-Control Leads to Anger
If you need help with loneliness, comfort eating or anger at your perceived inadequacies just contact me for a chat. Or if you need to know about the right food for you….then get my Ebook ‘Be your Own Diet Guru’, it gives you the facts on which to base your personal eating plan.read more
A recent client, a young man of 18 years came to see with his mother. They had big issues around his education and career planning. Geoff didn’t want any… and Mum wanted so much from him. This of course created a battle ground at home and eventually eroded all but shouting communication, until I was able to step in.
At the outset, most of our work together concentrated on establishing rapport with all parties and starting a dialogue between mother and son again.
Geoff did not want to stay in education but had no others ideas to put on the table. Somehow he thought that the government would continue to pay for him to live, fund his smoking and drinking and he would not be required to contribute anything. It seems his schooling and parenting had missed this bit..!
I got them both to tap …EFT (Emotional Freedom Techniques) which was kind of amazing and this proved to be the instant calmer that I love so much. We tried to find some common ground and after the second session there were major shifts as the light dawned.
It has made me think; do we prepare our young people properly for life. I see so many young people with a very odd understanding of ‘reality’, hence media comments of dysfunctional people being bred from dysfunctional environments.
In this day and age, young people would be better prepared for life by getting as much and as varied an education as possible and then just plain grafting….that means work Geoff!
In this instance Mother sees that she was too pushy and forgot to listen, Geoff also refused to listen…a very common situation in families I find! That and irritation of each other is a sure way to lose what little communication is left in the relationship.
We should take Carol Look’s (you can sign up for her newsletter) advice here and “Tap First, React Later”, this simple statement encourages us to tap before we need to, in fact for no reason and do it every day. Something even us long-standing tappers sometimes forget to do.
Lets hope that at least this young man will have his ‘new’ expectations of life met, as he has now found his passion and is prepared to put in the work to get there.
If you or your family are struggling with decisions for the future, I am here to help you, just contact me and we can talk about it.read more
This is the time of the Spring Equinox, when the light in the northern hemisphere is the same length as the dark, we also had a Super Moon,( click here to read more, then click on Lunascope or sign up for the newsletter).
We are seeing changes in our world, brought to us by the news media and the pictures on the television which bring this right into our own homes. Some are so painful that it is tempting to just close ourselves off from them and think only about the spring flowers, the warmth in the sun and our own well-being.
This is fine, but we do have to be aware of others and by thinking of them, be it New Zealand and Japan with the earthquakes or the Middle East in conflict again; whatever the crisis point, we can send out prayers in whichever method suits us. I have taken to reciting the mantra ‘Om mani padme hum’, a prayer for the world, as well as sending a gentle Reiki healing to those who need it.
At the same time that all of this is going on, we are facing financial cut backs and restraints in our own lives. Decisions about education and the attending costs, the rising increases in fuel and food prices and for some, especially the elderly, how to make the pension stretch.
If you are feeling overwhelmed with all these and your own issues, do some tapping using words like “I have enough”, “There is always enough”, “I choose to see the good in the world”, “I choose to be happy”. You can find out about EFT(Emotional Freedom Techniques) and how to do it on my website or contact me, I can teach you how to live a more comfortable life with less worry and stress and so much more happiness.
Happiness is a state inside you, not something you get from others. Smile, remember how fortunate you are now and be that change in your life and others. Your happiness will spill out and everyone around you will just get a little bit happier.
With love and happinessread more
We can appear to be well fed when all we eat is junk. This is not a nourished body and can well be dehydrated and extremely acidic; in this environment illness, disease and mental impairment issues will flourish.
Real, live food creates a real live body and an active mind. What we eat and drink has a direct bearing on the brain, as well as the body. It was not long ago that government increased the amount of fish and Omega 3 oils in prison diets and supplements, this has reduced the inmates levels of anger and disruption.
What we do know, is that to be well, physically, emotionally and mentally, we need an holistic approach to wellness. Good food and exercise provide our physical and energetic body the sustenance to live healthily and using EFT(Emotional Freedom Techniques) to address emotional issues and cravings gives us the tools to live happily.
Wellness and good nutrition is easy when you know how; if you are not sure, you can get my E book or contact me to talk it through.read more
So lunch today is very little and supper will be light, just to compensate for this overly large plate of food…..I could leave it but in reality I don’t.
OK some better eating tips..!!
* Have 4-5 small meals a day rather than 3 large ones
* Use a smaller plate or bowl and you will not notice eating less
* Never drink water or other fluids with your meal, it dilutes the gastric juices. The only exception is wine, the body treats this as a food…yay!! (It does have calories though)
* When you feel the need for something sweet, take a few salt crystals onto your tongue and do something to distract yourself until the craving goes…..or tap of course …EFT(Emotional Freedom Techniques) will sort this out, check this on my website.
* Have more vegetables on your plate, less protein and even less carbohydrate
* Grate raw carrot and courgette into a green salad, this gives more body and substance for fewer calories than bread, pasta or grains
* Eat fresh, local and in season……your body will thank you for it
* See yourself in your mind as already slim…believe it and it will happen
* Set your intention to be fit and healthy
If you are not sure about diets get my new Ebook “Be Your Own Diet Guru” read up on the choices and then you make up your own mind.
Or if you can’t be bothered…..talk to me and together we can dissolve the fat, not your motivation, slimming is all in the mind after all!
Diane Hollidayread more
Here are some tips which may help.
1. Take up an activity that will occupy your hands and engage the brain (knitting, crochet, writing, painting, calligraphy, wood carving) all portable and easy to get into.
2. Associate the cup of coffee or drink of alcohol with something other than cigarettes, maybe allowing yourself another treat, a text or telephone call to a friend, crisps with your drink at the pub. NB You may have to watch the amount you eat when you give up smoking but better to add a few pounds than shorten your life.
3. Learn EFT(Emotional Freedom Techniques) to alleviate your stress, tapping is not harmful.
4. Notice the way your sense to taste and smell come back; you will enjoy life more.
5. Always talk about giving up as if you already have “I gave up smoking a while ago” this stops people trying to entice you back to be like them.
6. Relish the extra time you have and of course, no need to stand about in the cold and wet to get your ‘fix’.
7. And finally, see how your body reacts after a few weeks off the weed. Easier breathing, less wrinkled skin and sweet-smelling breath.
So give yourself a real treat…..just get ready to stop smoking but if this seems all a bit too much, then contact me and together with EFT(Emotional Freedom Techniques) we can succeed!read more
First and foremost I want to help my fellow-man in all the ways that I can, with all the skills that I have. The other is to earn enough money to live comfortably; run my car (and be able to pay for the petrol) have a holiday once a year and treat my grandchildren on their birthdays and Christmas. None of this could I do without working.
Several years ago now, just before the Age Legislation came in, a couple of colleagues and I started a recruitment business for the over 50’s called ‘ Experience Counts’ and we had a great deal of interest from the over 50’s……but very few employers were prepared to play ball. So in the end we let the whole thing drop….wrong time maybe.
With this recession still with us, money is scarce and my clients are finding more urgent things to do with their incomes. For some it is cheaper to get a doctor’s prescription to mask symptoms in the short-term, rather than see an EFT(Emotional Freedom Techniques) therapist and coach like me, who can help find the cause of the illness, and eliminate it!
I cannot afford to sit and wait so am looking for a part-time job to fill the gap in both my time and finances. We older people, in the main are hale and hearty, fit and well and above all, wise and willing. We don’t do duvet days, have no small children to worry about and know the meaning of punctuality and commitment!
My older sister Pat and several of my local friends still work, some into their 70’s; they are doing important jobs, though maybe not that well paid but we are still citizens of the Universe and partake in life to the full, please do not write us off, our wisdom is needed and should be valued.
One of these friends is being marginalised and is being pushed out of job that she done exceptionally well for many years. She has taken on board all the changes and modernisation and has helped younger management to understand the business, so why does she have to go? Hang in there Hazel!
As part of my services I help people of all ages to find their way in life, career and business. I have mentored students of 17 to 70 years and now I need to mentor myself.
We need businesses to recognise both potential and experience in everyone, so once again I feel the need to galvanise support for us wise and willing older people, if you are with me on this, please add your comments here and on my new twitter account or contact me direct if you need help in your life.
Diane Hollidayread more
hink about the people who have been invited; the clothes, shoes, accommodation and presents they will all buy. This puts money into the economy and will filter down through the suppliers of such items to the providers of raw materials, the retail landlords and move money from the already well-healed into circulation for us, the rest….and at least not stay stashed away in the banks!
This takes me back to a previous Blog about money and the perceived lack. There is no lack of money…..think footballers and bankers wages for a start. It’s just that because we are told that there is a shortage we shut down our own spending, just in case the lack stops with us.
I have just spent a few days in London with family and let me tell you, there is so much money sloshing around there, you would be amazed.
Personally I could not bring myself to pay over £1,000 for a handbag or a pair of shoes, but many people do, and spend more than that. So many shops cater for the ‘high end’ spender, that we have to know that there are so many people with huge amounts of money to spend, or how could all these shops still be in business?
You and I may go to Primark or M&S for our bags and shoes because our incomes do not reach the dizzy heights of footballers or bankers. This is referred to as’ cutting your cloth according to your income’ and if brought up with this idea, as I was, spending money that you do not have is financial suicide .
It’s not easy to get into the mind-set of plenty when all you have is lack….to take your focus off money and look around you to see a world of wonders for free. Spring flowers are coming up, birds are singing, the sun will shine again (it will!) and love what you see and hear, there is plenty of that to go around.
We had a new Moon on Friday; make this an opportunity to change your mind about how you think about yourself. See this time as renewal and think yourself out of lack into plenty……read more
Why not make to today the start of the rest of your life, start a journal and write down your intentions and all the issues in your life that you can think of. For instance think about relationships, work problems and of course money issues. Write these down and then say….
“Today I choose to love myself and provide my body with good nourishment”
“I accept my problems and let them go… that was then and this is now”
“I love and respect myself… so others will love and respect me”
Then see how your problems are changing and becoming less powerful. Write down these changes in your journal.
If you know how to tap along with these statements, they become even more powerful. You can download information on EFT(Emotional Freedom Techniques) here.
Another idea is to build an inner vision of yourself, just the way you wish yourself to be. You could be wearing something you really like and looking wonderful, slim and healthy. Fix this in your mind and notice that just by recalling it, you can help you see your life as a positive affirmation of success, not a negative assumption of failure.
I hope these ideas help but if you are still battling, then you may like to read my new E-book ‘Be Your Own Diet Guru’.
Other than that, contact me for a chat and see what we can do together.
For all my services, our initial chat is FREE but I also offer half hour ‘Top Up’ sessions to existing clients and ‘Starter Sessions’ for new clients at only £25 per session, making my work accessible to everyone.
Smile, happiness is catching…. !read more